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Just ahead you will learn to direct communications for the desired effect. Do you recall the convicts spoken of earlier? They, against all odds find love while behind bars. How do they do it? They have no cell phones, laptops, pagers or anything which we associate with being a communications giant. But, they have something which we have overlooked, it is more than an equalizer, it is the ultimate in communications. He knows, as many con men (and women) know, that communications quality is the most powerful key to the human heart.

Their sociopathic genius lies in verbal and non-verbal communications. They have figured out through a lifetime of manipulation that verbal communications occur at different levels. They then figured out that the deeper the relationship the deeper and more successful the manipulation of an individual. They always exploit the most intimate levels of communication to render the hearts and minds of their victims defenseless.

In consideration of con artists and gold diggers we should know first that the deeper we allow others in, the more risk to ourselves. It is always more risky to share the heart than the mind, but the rewards are immeasurable. Now let us begin the five levels of communication. They are;

1. Cliché- This is the ice breaker level, used before more meaningful communications begin, even between friends. When seeing a friend we usually start with something like the following;


John: Hi Susan, how are you?

Susan: Hi John, good thank you.

Whether with a stranger or a friend we follow convention and start our conversation here before delving into deeper exchanges.

Other examples of level 1; How’s the weather? Nice day today, What’s up? How’s it going?

2. Facts- This second level is usually a spring board into higher levels amongst friends but does not yet require much thought or emotional energy. At this level we relate information on topics such as friends, family, activities, current events and trivia. After the obligatory salutations of level one we may then proceed to level two with something like the following;

John: Did you hear that my brother got married while you were away?

        Susan: No!

John: Yeah, he married Jane, they wanted to get married before he goes off to medical school.

Other examples of level two; John just joined the navy. Her eyes are the most beautiful green. They plan to have many children.

Other forms of this level are found in non-biased lectures on subjects such as math, chemistry, or grammar.

This is safe, still no opportunity for controversy.

(Christian personals service primer cont. click here.)