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"Iron sharpeneth iron; so a man sharpeneth the countenance of his friend" Proverbs 27:17

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Have you ever turned on the TV to find scores of self help ads? Guess what they sell? You guessed it. Did you go to psychology class in high school or college and learn about one of the prime motivators being self-actualization? What does that teach? Self is being taught all around us in every venue imaginable except one…The Holy Bible. We read in 2 Timothy 3:2,3 about the most hedonistic generation ever who happen to live in the “last days” quote- “For men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters. Proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, without natural affection…”

Many books could be written on this verse and it’s correlation to our generation alone. Do any of the other vile traits mentioned in the passage look familiar to you? Please note that the apostle Paul began the verse with “lovers of their own selves” then went on to list the fruit that such love brings. Covetousness, boasting, pride, thanklessness etc. these are all the fruits of self love. Of all the bad fruit generated by self love the one I would like to point out most is- “without natural affection” Please allow me to paraphrase-”unable to love others”

Dear reader, are you beginning to see the relation between the material presented here and Christian dating?

The prevailing wisdom of the day is that we cannot love others if we do not love ourselves. The inferred premise being that we do not love ourselves, that we hate ourselves. Ephesians 5:29: "For no man yet hated his own flesh…" The problem is that we love ourselves too much. God had it right (obviously) in Philipians 2:3: “…in lowliness of mind let each esteem other better than themselves”

Mother Teresa was asked once “how much money she made helping the sick, and dying” Her reply was very interesting, she said- “I would not do it for any amount of money… but for love I will do it”

In second Timothy 3:2 God is telling us that if we feed self we will become self-absorbed and unable to love others in the healthiest sense.

If we are to establish those desired deep relationships we must lose this infatuation with self and love others as we love ourselves. There must be a parity. Love of self must not overpower our love for others. Christian dating really demands this, as it is one of God's commandments. 

What are the signs of selfishness? Well, one is gratification or in more modern parlance, instant gratification. People want their MTV and they want it now.

Another outward manifestation of selfishness is materialism. Materialistic people are selfish, and selfish people are materialistic. MTV appeals very much to the materialistic self. Vulgar gangster rappers are somehow held up as icons to our youth. No other culture would have made them as tremendously wealthy and famous as our self-centered, and materialistic pop sub-culture. These rappers personify superficial selfishness in the extreme with their big gold chains, expensive cars, and luxurious mansions filled with servants, and let’s not forget the scantily clad groupies. You couldn’t come up with worse role models from any other generation in all history. On this point our generation is again unfortunately unique from all others before us.


One of the most damaging buzz words being crooned and crowed from the ivory towers of academia is “self-esteem” The academic “elite” know full well that when it is administered in heavy doses to immature minds the resulting outcome will be self-love. The children have been well indoctrinated as the previous story about the high school aptitude test (explained a few pages back) illustrates.

So, what can we learn from the example of the high school aptitude test? Self-esteem transformed them into braggarts, unable and unwilling to identify their own ignorance. The apostle Paul put it well when he wrote about the “last days” generation in Romans 1:22. “Professing themselves to be wise they became fools” Does this sound like the indoctrinated students above?

So what does this have to do with our Christian personals service primer? We must be deprogrammed from the "wisdom of the world", which is foolishness to God. It will become a trap for an unsuspecting and wicked generation. 

What wickedness? Let us shift into a higher gear, and see through the glass more clearly.

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